A Little Tangent and Roller Coaster Rides

I was thinking the other night about my life.  I was thinking about how different my life has been from what my expectations of my life would be when I was younger.  How different God's plan for me has been from what my own plan was.  Different in some ways but I guess in the most important matters such as family and faith they are the same.  My ultimate goal was to have a family and raise them to be active in our faith and gain strong testimonies of our Father in Heaven and His Plan of Salvation and never stray from it.  (Got a little ways to go before I know if my kids will stay true but I will try to do my best to teach them to love God and to help them understand how much He loves them and wants what is best for them and to teach them the importance of obeying His laws and how if they do that, obeying will bring them the greatest blessings and the greatest peace and happiness._  Anyway went off on a tangent there for a sec.  Back to God's plan and my plan.  My plan was to go to 2 year  college, graduate, meet the man of my dreams,  get married at 19-20, have ten kids and live perfectly happy forever after.  God's plan so far for me has been go to college, serve an 18 month mission for our church in California, work for 2 years, work more and go back to school for another 2 years, and then at 27 get married.  Have first child with a somewhat complicated pregnancy that possibly put Colton at risk of not making it full term.  Then struggle to get pregnant second time for 3 years.  Life was still very good and wonderful but just missing the opportunity to have another child.  Then miraculously we got pregnant with Chelsea and felt extremely blessed.  Nine months later Kary has his stroke that turns us upside down and around.   Which gets me thinking about roller coasters.... (But before I go on about roller coasters I have to get back to my original thought about how glad I am that the plan I had all worked up at a young age isn't God's plan.  His plan has turned out so much better!)  Back to roller coasters...

I LOVE roller coasters and we have all heard of how life is like a roller coaster.  Well, shoot, it really is.  Ha ha! Ups and downs and arounds.  I love the anticipation when I first get on and I don't know what I'm in for.  I love how it starts out slow and then speeds up and then whisks us around and up to the sky and then that pit in my stomach I get right as I reach the top of the roller coaster as I anticipate, and dread at the same time, the drop that I know is coming and I get kind of nervous and scared. And then the screams come flyin' out of my mouth as I feel like I'm dropping to my death but before I hit I'm whisked back up again and then sometimes it does the loopy loops and I'm turned upside down and get confused as to what right side up is but eventually figure it out as the coaster sets right side up again  Yeah, life IS like that.  Despite the fear I sometimes feel during the ride, in the long run I thoroughly enjoy the ride and anticipate riding the next one.  Lately I have been kind of been more like dreading rather than anticipating what God's roller coaster ride is going to have in store for me next.  Kary's stroke was definitely a downfall and yet at the same time we have felt that feeling in your stomach you get when you fall that makes you want to laugh and cry at the same time.  We have felt to cry, we have suffered, and yet we have reason to rejoice and have witnessed many blessings and miracles that make us smile. I am really going to try and make a conscious effort to anticipate and look forward to the ride I'm on...anticipate the ups and the downs and look at it as a good challenge for learning and growth as I know in the end when the ride is done, after having hung on for dear life and thoroughly enjoyed the ups and endured the downfalls and loopy loops I will look back and realize what a fun ride it has been after all.  Yee-haw! 

Look to God and Live

I don't know why but I have been reflecting a LOT on my experiences I had as a missionary 13-14 years ago. I have been reading in my journal and thinking a lot about the people I came in contact with and was blessed to teach. I have also been watching a show called "The District" on BYUtv. So great as it helps remind me of the experiences I had teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ to His children. I was blessed to serve as a missionary for 18 months in the Carlsbad, California Mission. I truly loved the people I came in contact with. I loved my companions and learned something from each one of them. It was such a great blessing in my life to be a missionary and serve others. It was hard but so worth the joy and blessings that I received. Teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ truly brings me joy. I am reminded of this scripture: D&C 18:15 "And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father!" It is a blessing to see how the Gospel of Jesus Christ changes lives.

Here is a small excerpt from my missionary journal I feel like sharing as it actually helped remind me what I need to be doing more of these days.  Some days it's hard to see past the right now and easy to feel nervous about the future.  Don't get me wrong we are happy, but sometimes I just wonder what the future holds and how much longer Kary has to suffer physically.  I can't see the big picture and sometimes I just wish I could see beyond the present.  I need to remember what I wrote here:

 I'm out sitting on the trampoline in the backyard. I'm looking around me and I can't believe I'm in California...me...a small country girl...in the middle of this big city. Palm trees all around me, houses all around me. I am used to wide open spaces and being able to see all around me and I feel very cooped up and almost trapped because I don't know what is going on around me. I can't see.   I realize that the only way for me to see anything is to look up. I guess that is how my life is. When I feel there is nowhere to turn or I feel like I'm not going anywhere, the only thing I can do is look up towards God and rely on Him to help me see the big picture and trust in Him because He is the one who can see the WHOLE picture. He knows what is best for me in my life. Look to God and LIVE!"

Anyway, I have just had some wonderful experiences with regards to my mission and someone I taught and met with then in the last few days that would take a really long time to share but it is another witness to me that God knows His children.  He knows our hearts.  He knows our thoughts.  He hears our prayers.  He answers them.  So grateful!

LIGHT

I recently had a conversation with a good friend about the Light of Christ, the Holy Ghost, and about Revelation. This is a 3 part video that discusses all three. Such a beautiful explanation. I'm so grateful for this knowledge and to be able to have the light of Christ, the Holy Ghost, and revelation to help guide me in this life. Our Father in Heaven has not left us in darkness. We have Christ, who is the LIGHT of the world, to show us the way. He has lit the path and all we must do is follow Him and we will not be led into darkness. Darkness will NEVER overpower us. We can receive personal revelation from God. He will brighten our path and show us the way. To me light equals happiness, warmth, and comfort. Darkness equals despair and fear. Why do people choose darkness over light? Some may get used to being in the dark for so long that they are afraid to come out of the dark into the light. They don't realize the joy and peace and comfort that only LIGHT can bring. Darkness will never bring those things. I wish I could help people experience the LIGHT. I love my Savior. He is such a comfort and a strength and a LIGHT to me. I wish all could experience His Light, His Love, His Peace, His Comfort, and His Guidance.

Take The SLIVER Out

I have to share this article.  Unfortunately I have learned the hard way that it is better to forgive quickly than to hang on to grudges concerning family members that may have hurt me at one time or another. I have learned that the person I hurt the most by not forgiving family members is myself.  I have learned that I miss out on special bonding opportunities by holding grudges and not forgiving.   I learned that not forgiving someone is a very heavy burden to carry.  I have learned that if I want others to forgive me then I need to forgive others.  It is the greatest sense of relief the minute you let go of the grudge you are holding and forgive your family members of their offense.  It's like getting a sliver.  If you have a sliver and you don't do anything about it then it gets more and more infected. And you feel worse and worse. If you pull it out, it can heal.  And you are spared pain.  When we forgive quickly we are spared the hurt and pain that not forgiving can cause.  We can't truly be happy until we forgive because there will always be that underlying irritation that won't allow us to be at peace.

 
One Key to a Happy Family

By President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Second Counselor in the First Presidency

10490_000_003The great Russian author Leo Tolstoy began his novel Anna Karenina with these words: “Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”¹ While I do not have Tolstoy’s certainty that happy families are all alike, I have discovered one thing that most have in common: they have a way of forgiving and forgetting the imperfections of others and of looking for the good.

Those in unhappy families, on the other hand, often find fault, hold grudges, and can’t seem to let go of past offenses.

“Yes, but …” begin those who are unhappy. “Yes, but you don’t know how badly she hurt me,” says one. “Yes, but you don’t know how terrible he is,” says another.

Perhaps both are right; perhaps neither.

There are many degrees of offense. There are many degrees of hurt. But what I have noticed is that often we justify our anger and satisfy our consciences by telling ourselves stories about the motives of others that condemn their actions as unforgivable and egoistic while, at the same time, lifting our own motives as pure and innocent.

The Prince’s Dog

There is an old Welsh story from the 13th century about a prince who returned home to find his dog with blood dripping down its face. The man rushed inside and, to his horror, saw that his baby boy was missing and his cradle overturned. In anger the prince pulled out his sword and killed his dog. Shortly thereafter, he heard the cry of his son—the babe was alive! By the infant’s side lay a dead wolf. The dog had, in reality, defended the prince’s baby from a murderous wolf.

Though this story is dramatic, it demonstrates a point. It opens the possibility that the story we tell ourselves about why others behave a certain way does not always agree with the facts—sometimes we don’t even want to know the facts. We would rather feel self-justified in our anger by holding onto our bitterness and resentment. Sometimes these grudges can last months or years. Sometimes they can last a lifetime.

A Family Divided

One father could not forgive his son for departing from the path he had been taught. The boy had friends the father did not approve of, and he did many things contrary to what his father thought he should do. This caused a rift between father and son, and as soon as the boy could, he left home and never returned. They rarely spoke again.

Did the father feel justified? Perhaps.

Did the son feel justified? Perhaps.

All I know is that this family was divided and unhappy because neither father nor son could forgive each other. They could not look past the bitter memories they had about each other. They filled their hearts with anger instead of love and forgiveness. Each robbed himself of the opportunity to influence the other’s life for good. The divide between them appeared so deep and so wide that each became a spiritual prisoner on his own emotional island.

Fortunately, our loving and wise Eternal Father in Heaven has provided the means to overcome this prideful gap. The great and infinite Atonement is the supreme act of forgiveness and reconciliation. Its magnitude is beyond my understanding, but I testify with all my heart and soul of its reality and ultimate power. The Savior offered Himself as ransom for our sins. Through Him we gain forgiveness.

No Family Is Perfect

None of us is without sin. Every one of us makes mistakes, including you and me. We have all been wounded. We all have wounded others.

It is through our Savior’s sacrifice that we can gain exaltation and eternal life. As we accept His ways and overcome our pride by softening our hearts, we can bring reconciliation and forgiveness into our families and our personal lives. God will help us to be more forgiving, to be more willing to walk the second mile, to be first to apologize even if something wasn’t our fault, to lay aside old grudges and nurture them no more. Thanks be to God, who gave His Only Begotten Son, and to the Son, who gave His life for us.

We can feel God’s love for us every day. Shouldn’t we be able to give a little more of ourselves to our fellowmen as taught in the beloved hymn “Because I Have Been Given Much”?² The Lord has opened the door for us to be forgiven. Wouldn’t it be only right to put aside our own egotism and pride and begin to open that blessed door of forgiveness to those with whom we struggle—especially to all of our own family?

In the end, happiness does not spring from perfection but from applying divine principles, even in small steps. The First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles have declared: “Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”³

Forgiveness is positioned right in the middle of these simple truths, founded on our Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness. Because forgiveness connects principles, it connects people. It is a key, it opens locked doors, it is the beginning of an honest path, and it is one of our best hopes for a happy family.

May God help us to be a little more forgiving in our families, more forgiving of each other, and perhaps more forgiving even with ourselves. I pray that we may experience forgiveness as one wonderful way in which most happy families are alike.

Think Positive!

I was talking with my Mom today and she told me of something she had recently heard or read that said to basically find something positive about each moment, or hour, or day.  This week has been a little tough because both kids have been sick with fevers and coughing and I've been trying my best to keep them comfortable and meanwhile the house is turned upside down, the laundry is piling up, the dishes are piling, and we've all been cooped up in the house for a whole entire week.  I'm an emotional wreck when my kids are sick.  I worry about things that might happen that never ends up happening but I worry about it anyway just in case it does.  Ha ha!  Seriously!?  So, positive about this week...we all survived!!  LOL!  Today I actually got real clothes on, put make up on, and got to get out and run some errands.  It's amazing what a little makeup and getting dressed can do for my outlook on life.  Ha!  I should do it a little more often...ha ha!  Then I got to talk to a good friend tonight that was much needed therapy.  Thank you Mercedi! 

It is good to try and find the positive in each day or each situation.  I try to think about the many many blessings that we have recieved since Kary's stroke.  There are so many that I couldn't possibly name them all.  It's crazy to think that a trial can be a blessing but this one has been in many different ways.  I definitely would rather it didn't happen but I'm grateful for the things I'm learning and witnessing.  I still have many lessons to learn and I hope that I don't forget the things that I HAVE learned.  I'm reminded of Laman and Lemuel in the Book of Mormon that have many witnesses of the hand of God in their lives and yet they forget them and turn away from Him.  I don't want to be like that.  I want to remember all the miracles and witnesses that I have had in my life that denote that God lives...that He loves us...and that if we let Him; He will direct our lives for good.  He is always there for us if we let Him into our lives. 

Revelations 3:20 "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and ^aopen the door, I will ^bcome in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."

I love this scripture because it reminds me that God could open the door himself, but He must be invited in before He can enter.  May we invite Him into our lives each day and our days will seem brighter and finding the positive in our situations will be easier as well because we have HOPE through Him.

Prophets In Our Day

We have Modern Day Prophet's and Apostles...just like those of old. God continues to speak to His servants, the prophets. People in the times of the Bible accepted or rejected the words of God's Holy prophets . We have the opportunity to hear the word's of God's Prophets in our day ...let us be among the believers as in the days of old. Watch or read their addresses here.

Families Can Be Together Forever

A dear friend and neighbor passed away yesterday.  He was like family to us.  I am feeling so much for his family who is left behind to mourn his loss.  I hope they know that they will see their Husband/Father/Grandfather again someday and have the opportunity to be together as a family once again. He was a very good man.  A very good example of someone who tried to serve the Lord and serve others every day of his life.  We love him very much and are so grateful we were blessed to have him be a part of our lives as well.

Temple Blessings

This weekend I had to speak at our Stake Conference Saturday Evening Session.  I was asked to speak about the blessings that I have recieved from attending the temple.  Of course they are many.  I just want to share part of my talk..

"
Being sealed to my family has definitely been one of the greatest blessings in my life. I have thought a lot about this lately. This blessing has especially meant more to me in the past couple of years. Most of you know that my husband Kary had a stroke almost 3 years ago. We almost lost him but through faith and many prayers in his behalf he lives. He was left paralyzed on his left side and legally blind and also is in much pain most of the time. Because of this, I have much of the responsibility for caring for his needs. I don’t begrudge having to care for him. I love him and feel so blessed that he is still with us. I would rather be the one to care for him than anyone else. Some days are tough, though when I’m trying to juggle caring for him and the 2 children and cooking meals, paying bills, cleaning house, etc… One of the main things that keeps me going though is knowing that Kary and I have been sealed in the temple. We will be together not only in this life but the next. I am very blessed to have Kary in my life. He has always been so good to me. I figure it’s my turn to pay him back for the best years of my life. I also know that if I take good care of Kary in this life he’s going to spoil me in the next life! All kidding aside, this blessing of being sealed in the temple to my family and knowledge I have gained there does help me carry on each day….it gives me hope and it gives me purpose.


Richard G. Scott, one of the twelve apostles shared (in a 2009 April Ensign article) an experience of an ancestor of his wife. This ancestor’s name is Sarah DeArmon Pea Rich. Her words show the impact that the temple can have in our lives. When she was 31 years old, she received a calling from Brigham Young to work in the Nauvoo Temple, before the Saints had to abandon that temple. This is what she wrote:
“Many were the blessings we had received in the house of the Lord, which has caused us joy and comfort in the midst of all our sorrows and enabled us to have faith in God, knowing He would guide us and sustain us in the unknown journey that lay before us. For if it had not been for the faith and knowledge that was bestowed upon us in that temple by the influence and help of the Spirit of the Lord, our journey would have been like one taking a leap in the dark. To start out on such a journey in the winter as it were and in our state of poverty, it would seem like walking into the jaws of death. But we had faith in our Heavenly Father, and we put our trust in Him feeling that we were His chosen people and had embraced His gospel, and instead of sorrow, we felt to rejoice that the day of our deliverance had come.”2
Just as the pioneers had to trudge along on the trek west, some days I feel like I’m trudging along the same way in my daily routine that seems overwhelming and hard sometimes. The knowledge and blessings of the gospel and the temple kept them going. So does my knowledge of the gospel and the blessings of the temple keep me going. I don’t want to give up or give in. I want to keep going so that I can enjoy my forever family in this life and in the next.

Ten months after my husband's  stroke we were able to attend the temple together. It was one of the most blessed and peaceful experiences I’ve had since the onset of Kary’s stroke. Being with him there just really helped me to put our life in perspective. I know Kary’s physical ailments are temporary. I know that if we endure this life well and with faith in our Father above and our Savior Jesus Christ that we will be blessed far more than we can even comprehend. I felt our Father’s love for us there. I felt His understanding of our situation. The Holy Ghost spoke peace and comfort to our hearts and minds and helped us understand that just as this pioneer sister said so beautifully that He “would guide us and sustain us in our unknown journey that lay before us.” We don’t know exactly what our future holds with Kary and his recovery. Each day we take one step forward in faith, knowing that God will be with us. He has provided so much. More than I probably even realize or recognize sometimes. Somehow our experiences will be for our good and God will help us every step of the way. We just need to endure it and endure it well with faith in God and our Savior."

 I have a very dear friend who has recently been told that her husband only has 2-4 months left to live as he is suffering from cancer.  Before she found out about her husband's cancer earlier in the year we had been able to have many gospel discussions.  She asked me once if I believed if we recognized our loved ones in the next life.  I of course replied that we would and explained a little about God's plan for families to be together not only in this life but the next.   She told me that she didn't believe we would recognize our loved ones in the next life because she knows there will be no sadness or tears in Heaven and if she gets to the next life and sees that a member of her family isn't there because they have not been baptized then she will cry and be sad.  So, with her belief that we won't recognize our loved ones in the next life and her husband given his news I can only imagine how devastating it will be for her to lose her husband.  So much more devastating for someone who has the belief that they will someday get to see their loved one again, but not only that, they will be able to still have the relationship of husband and wife.  I so much want to share with her my knowledge that she will see and recognize her husband in the next life and even has the opportunity to be sealed to him for time and all eternity...never to be separated again. 

This is God's plan...for us to continue our family relationships into the next life.  I'm truly grateful for this knowledge.

Repentance

I had to speak in church today on repentance.  I haven't posted in a very long time so I thought I would share it here:

To start off I’d like to relay a story that was told by President David O. McKay :

“One day, a group of small boys were swimming. Perhaps it would be more accurate to say, they were learning to swim; for none could take more than a few strokes. Just below them a short distance down the stream was a treacherous hole much beyond their depth. Into this, either through bravado or accident, one daring youngster either plunged or fell. He became helpless to save himself; and for a moment his companions were powerless to aid him. Fortunately, one with presence of mind and quick action, jerked a long stick from a willow fence and held one end of it toward the drowning lad. The latter grasped it, held on tightly, and was saved. All the boys declared that the venturesome lad owed his life to the boy who furnished the means of rescue.” (The Gospel of Work, Instructor, Jan 1955, p 1.)

We are all like the young boy in this story who fell. We all fall into sin and have need to repent and be saved . Jesus is like the rescuer and His atonement is like the stick. Jesus offers us the Atonement as the way to receive forgiveness. When we repent, we reach out to accept the Atonement just as the drowning boy reached out to grasp the stick and was saved. If we accept the Atonement by repenting, we will be forgiven and be saved from our sins.

　

Let’s go into a little more detail and ask ourselves, “Why is it necessary for us to repent in this life?” We know that we can find all the answers to our questions in the scriptures. In D&C 1:31, The Lord says, “For I the Lord cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance. “ When we are brought to this earth we are clean and pure. During this time of testing and trial we all make mistakes and we sin. We are no longer clean and pure when we sin. We used to use an analogy on my mission where we ask our investigators to imagine that we live in a beautiful mansion with our Father and Mother and brothers and/or sisters. Our home is beautiful, and clean, and all white. One day we decide to go out to play and find ourselves too tempted and can’t resist the mud puddles. We run and jump in the mud puddles and get all dirty. Well, we are tired now and desire to go back inside our home. Our Father is standing at the door shaking his head and telling us that we can’t come in looking as we are. We are devastated and don’t know what to do now. Well, our older brother comes around the corner with a water hose and asks us if we want him to help us get cleaned up so we can go back inside. He helps us get cleaned up and we are able to now enter our beautiful home. The analogy isn’t perfect by any means but it gets us to see that as it says in 1^st Nephi 10:21, “…no unclean thing can dwell with God.” We must be cleansed from sin before we can inherit the kingdom of heaven.

Which brings us to ask How do we become clean? How is Repentance made possible? Referring back to the analogy of the boy who fell…he needed rescued and so do we need rescued from our sins. In Alma 34:8-9 Amulek answers the question as to how we can become clean :

“8 ...Behold, I say unto you, that I do know that Christ shall come among the children of men, to take upon him the transgressions of his people, and that he shall atone for the sins of the world; for the Lord God hath spoken it.

9 For it is expedient that an atonement should be made; for according to the great plan of the Eternal God there must be an atonement made, or else all mankind must unavoidably perish except it be through the atonement which it is expedient should be made.”

So Christ, because he suffered for our sins has grabbed the stick and is holding it out to us. He has done his part and now we must do ours by exercising our faith unto repentance. We must grab hold of the stick and use the atonement to help pull ourselves out of the treacherous hole that sin leads us into.

In Doctrine and Covenants 19:16-17 Christ solidifies this teaching by saying,

“16 For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent;

17 But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I;”

Richard G. Scott declared in the Apr 1995 conference,

“Each of us has made mistakes, large or small, which if unresolved will keep us from the presence of God. For this reason, the atonement of Jesus Christ is the single most significant event that ever has or ever will occur. This selfless act of infinite consequence, performed by a single glorified personage, has eternal impact in the life of every son and daughter of our Father in Heaven—without exception.”
“Finding Forgiveness,” Ensign, May 1995, 75

The ability that we have to grab on to the stick or the atonement is such a great and life saving gift that has been given to us. What love our older brother, our Savior, and friend has for us that He would rescue us. May we come unto Him and be perfected in Him.

I’d like to read the words to a favorite hymn: “Come Unto Jesus”

“1. Come unto Jesus, ye heavy laden,
Careworn and fainting, by sin oppressed.
He’ll safely guide you unto that haven
Where all who trust him may rest.

2. Come unto Jesus; He’ll ever heed you,
Though in the darkness you’ve gone astray.
His love will find you and gently lead you
From darkest night into day.

3. Come unto Jesus; He’ll surely hear you,
If you in meekness plead for his love.
Oh, know you not that angels are near you
From brightest mansions above?

4. Come unto Jesus from ev’ry nation,
From ev’ry land and isle of the sea.
Unto the high and lowly in station,
Ever he calls, “Come to me.”

Text and music: Orson Pratt Huish, 1851–1932 (LDS Hymns, No. 117)

Brothers and Sisters, Repentance takes effort on our part. There are things that we must do in order to be forgiven.

The first step to repentance is for us to have faith in God. Repentance is an act of faith, because it requires us to really believe there is a God and that it is worth the effort required to repent of our sins.

We must recognize our sins. Alma counseled his son Corianton, who had been unfaithful in his missionary calling and had committed serious sins: “Let your sins trouble you, with that trouble which shall bring you down unto repentance. …Do not endeavor to excuse yourself in the least point” (Alma 42:29-30)

We must feel sorrow for our sins. We must feel that our sins are terrible. We recognize the heavy burdens that our sins place upon us and wish to unload and abandon them.

We must forsake our sins. Our sorrow should lead us to forsake our sins. In D&C 58:43 the Lord revealed to the prophet Joseph Smith, “By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins--behold, he will confess them and forsake them.”

We must also Confess our sins. The Lord has commanded us to confess our sins. Confession relieves a heavy burden from the sinner.. The Lord promised in D&C 61:2,” I, the Lord, forgive sins, and am merciful unto those who confess their sins with humble hearts.”

We must make restitution. As much as possible we must make right any wrong that we have done.

We must forgive others. In Doctrine and Covenants 82:1 we read , “Verily, verily, I say unto you, my servants, that inasmuch as you have forgiven one another your trespasses, even so I, the Lord, forgive you.”

One final thing that we need to do to make our repentance complete is to keep the commandments of the Lord. When we repent we have a change of heart and have a desire to serve God and keep His commandments.



Brothers and Sisters as we repent, the Atonement of Jesus Christ becomes fully effective in our lives, and the Lord forgives our sins. We are rescued from the treacherous hole , and we experience peace and joy. Alma recounted his experience of repenting from his sinful past:

“My soul was harrowed up [troubled] to the greatest degree and racked with all my sins.

“Yea, I did remember all my sins and iniquities, for which I was tormented with the pains of hell; yea, I saw that I had rebelled against my God, and that I had not kept his holy commandments.

“… So great had been my iniquities, that the very thought of coming into the presence of my God did rack my soul with inexpressible horror.

“… It came to pass that as I was … harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy … concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world.

“Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me. …

“And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more. …

“And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!

“… There can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy” (Alma 36:12–14, 17–21).

I think that we have all felt the anguish that sinning brings to our hearts and souls.
The Savior is holding the stick out to us. I know that if we come unto Him; if we grab hold of the stick and use the atonement and repent of our sins every day that we will experience the sweet joy that comes from repenting and being once again pure that we will one day return to live with our Father in Heaven again.

In the name of Jesus Christ Amen.

　

Heaven is Here

I just finished reading "Heaven is Here" by Stephanie Nielson.  She and her husband were in a plane crash and survived.  Stephanie's body was 80% burned and her husband also suffered from burns.  This book tells her amazing journey.  It's an amazing love story as well.  What an inspiration she and her husband are to me.  I started reading excerpts of the book to Kary of when she was in the hospital and I know that Kary experienced similar things.  He just hasn't voiced them.  I  really want Kary to be able to share his feelings someday.  He has been through so much and continues to struggle with different things every day.  It's an emotional and physical and mental roller coaster. One thing that we have in common with Stephanie is our faith and trust in God and love of family. These are the two things that truly help us carry on.

Stephanie quotes from a conference address given by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (an Apostle) Her family knows Elder Holland and he told her family that when he wrote this talk he had them specifically in mind.  I just want to quote it too because the words are so comforting and true.

"When lonely, cold, hard times come, we have to endure, we have to continue, we have to persist...Keep knocking on that door.  Keep pleading.  In the meantime, know that God hears your cries and knows your distress.  He is your Father, and you are His child."  

Patience and faith are key here.  We must trust in Father above and know that all will be done in His way and in His timing.  Sometimes we may feel that our prayers are not being heard or answered.  We want them to be answered our way and in our timing.  I know that if I continue to put my faith in God that it will all work out somehow.  He's got it all under control.  Somedays I really need to remember that! =)

She also quotes Elder Holland in another talk, "But when we speak of those who are instruments in the hand of God, we are reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil.  Some of them we walk with and talk with---here, now, every day...Indeed heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind."

We have so many earthly angels that have surrounded us in our time of need.  Angels is the word that we use to describe everyone that has helped us on our journey.   I know that we have had unseen angels surrounding us and petitioning Father above in our behalf as well.

I especially love this quote from Elder Holland, " I testify that bad days come to an end, that faith always triumphs and that heavenly promises are always kept."

We have the promise of Kary being healed. We have the promise of our Savior's love and His ability to make our burdens light. We have been promised that if we endure that we will be blessed.

Yay!

Thursday Reflection: Revelation

I recently had a discussion with a very good friend of mine on the topic of Religion.  I thoroughly enjoy talking with people on this subject. I haven't written on this blog for a few weeks because I simply ran out of ideas but our conversation has produced some spark in me to write about our main topic of conversation that day.

We got on the topic of a passage of scripture in Revelations Chapter 22 vs. 18-19.  Some people have used this passage to defend the idea that there can be no more revelation or scripture after the Bible because that would be adding to the Bible. In this way they try to discredit the Book of Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price.

Moses, wrote the same about his books (Deuteronomy 4:2). If those words of Moses were interpreted in the same way some have interpreted what John wrote, then there would be no Bible after the first five books. John, like Moses, was simply referring to what God had directed him to write—the book of Revelation.

To me it just makes so much sense that God would communicate with His people today as He has since the beginning of time. Why would one generation of people be more favored of the Lord if He was the same yesterday, today, and forever? Why would one nation (Jews) be more favored than another? (The Ancient Americans) The testimony of two nations stands as a greater witness that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

The great thing about all of this confusion is that we can know the truth for ourselves regarding the scriptures and their meaning.  In James 1:5 we are told that 5 ^aIf any of you lack ^bwisdom, let him ask of God, that ^cgiveth to all men liberally, and ^dupbraideth not; and it shall be given him.  Also in Luke 11: 9-10 it says, "9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

10 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened."

I believe that God answers our prayers through scriptures most definitey but we can also recieve personal revelation from God through the Holy Ghost.  In John 14:26 Jesus says, "But the ^aComforter, which is the ^bHoly Ghost, whom the Father will send in my ^cname, he shall ^dteach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you."  In Galatians 5: 22-23 we are taught, "But the ^afruit of the ^bSpirit is ^clove, ^djoy, ^epeace, ^flongsuffering, ^ggentleness, goodness, ^hfaith,

23 ^aMeekness, ^btemperance: against such there is no law."

I have a very firm and strong testimony that we can recieve a witness that God has revealed his truths to His servants in the Bible, in the Book of Mormon, and continues to reveal things to His servants, the prophets, in our day.  God IS the same yesterday, today, and forever.  I have recieved a personal witness from the Holy Ghost that the Bible is the word of God as far as it is translated correctly, the Book of Mormon IS another testament of Jesus Christ, and that God does indeed speak to His Prophets in our day.  Joseph Smith did indeed pray in a grove of trees to know which church to join and was visited by God, our Father, and His son, Jesus Christ. His Gospel has been restored on the earth today through the prophet Joseph Smith. Christ is the head of His church on the earth today:  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  We have a Prophet and Apostles who teach us God's will and truth's in our day just as in times of old.  God has provided a way for us to know His truth's through the power of the Holy Ghost.

I issue an invitation to everyone who has not gained a personal witness for themselves of the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon and of continued revelation through His holy prophets, that they experiment on the word of God and indeed, "Ask God in faith"  and He will let you know the truth through the power of the Holy Ghost.

Sunday Reflection: Family History

I have recently joined a couple of genealagy websites and am starting to feel a desire and a fire to be connected with my ancestors.  Not only to be connected to my ancestors but to help my friends and family be connected to their ancestors as well.  I love this little video and the analogy of the string.  I want to be thought of and remembered someday.  I don't want to be forgotten.   God wants us to be connected with our ancestors.  In Malachi 4: 5-6 it says, "

 5 ¶Behold, I will ^asend you ^bElijah the prophet ^cbefore the coming of the ^dgreat and dreadful ^eday of the Lord:

 6 And he shall ^aturn the ^bheart of the ^cfathers to the ^dchildren, and the heart of the ^echildren to their fathers, lest I come and ^fsmite the ^gearth with a ^hcurse."

Family history work and journals help us to “turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers” (Mal. 4:6). As we learn stories about our ancestors, we see into their hearts and we appreciate them. As we write in our journals, we remember the Lord’s blessings and we help our future children see into our hearts.

I love hearing stories of my ancestors and reading things they have written because I gain a better understanding of who they are and as I come to understand who they are it gives me a greater understanding of who I am and who I can become. 

I am grateful to be part of a great heritage.  Learning about my ancestors and the great people they were and how hard they worked, and the trials they faced and how true they were to their knowledge and beliefs about God gives me strength to endure my trials. I want to have the same kind of faith they had.  I think that if they can do it so can I because I'm part of them. 

 "We are who we are because they were who they were."  Anonymous

If you haven't started any family history and would like to get started here are a couple of websites I use that have been helpful:

 

http://www.ancestry.com/

http://familysearch.org/

Writing in a journal is a good way to get started, too, for your own posterity.  The things we experience are not just for us to learn from but also our posterity.

You can also click here to find out more about why The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints emphasizes Family History work.

(Kary's Great Grandma and Grandpa Behm with most of their children.  Kary's Grandpa is in the front row, in the middle. They are Russian Born Germans.)  So COOL!

Sunday Reflection: He Knows Me

The past couple of weeks have been kind of a struggle emotionally for me.  I know God loves me and is aware of me as I have had many witnesses in my life to this fact.  I don't really know why the past couple of weeks have been harder than others, but it has.  I have had a thought in my mind for the past couple of weeks of wishing a specific person would be able to come to our home.  When I got the thought I would tell myself to put it out of my mind because there was no way this person would come to our home.  Well, on Thursday night we got a call telling us that this exact person was indeed going to come visit us on Saturday as well as another person.  It was just another witness to me that God knows every thought in our mind and He knows the desires of our hearts.  He loves us so much.  How thankful I am for the visit we had from not only one, but two very special people.  It was an inspired visit and helped buoy not only me up but Kary as well. (Elder Keith Edwards from the Seventy and also President Robert Seger from the Stake presidency)

Sunday Reflection : The Sacrament

I needed to be reminded of this today as I have fallen so short the past couple of days.  I have just been so ornery with my family the last couple of days.  I'm grateful for the opportunity I have to repent every day and to renew my covenants with Heavenly Father each Sunday by taking the Sacrament.  When I am able to take the Sacrament and take it sincerely with real intent my spirit is renewed and I feel my Savior's love for me.  I'm grateful for the Savior and the love He has for all of us.

Tuesday Reflection: Family

The last couple of weeks for some reason have been extra hard for me it seems.  Last week especially I just really felt stressed with all the things I have to do.  And it just seemed like my house was closing in on me.  I try to keep up with it all but can't get on top of things and I just really started to feel like I was drowning.  Then yesterday my youngest and myself got the flu.  Luckily my daughter's bout didn't last long but mine lasted from 7:30 in the morning until 2 or 3 this morning. I felt like I was going to die.  I lost 3 pounds.  I've been wanting to lose weight but not like that.  Ouchy!    So with my anxiety and then getting sick it was just all so overwhelming and I asked my husband to give me a priesthood blessing.  After it was over I just started sobbing uncontrollably and just letting go of all the pent up emotions I had.  Kary put his arm around me, my son (6) sees me and comes over and puts his arms around me and then my daughter (2) comes  and puts her arms around me and pats my back and says, "It's okay Mommy. It's okay."  At that moment I just felt so much love for my little family and was just reminded that our little family and the love and support that we give each other is the most important thing.  It doesn't matter that my house is a mess and that I have a mountain of laundry in my basement, and my dishes are undone, my bills are unpaid, etc....those things don't matter.  I realized that that is why we are sent here on earth to be part of a family....they are a source of love, strength, and support, and comfort to us.  We don't have to face this life alone.  Family is there for the good times and the bad.  They tell you the truth when no one else will.  They love you despite your weaknesses and challenge you to grow and be more than you are because they see you for what you truly can become.  I'm so grateful for my own sweet little family.  I'm grateful for my Mom and Dad and my brothers and sisters.  They have been such a help to me in my time of need.  They have been a source of strength and comfort.  I'm also so grateful for Kary's family.  We feel their love and support as well and are grateful for the strength and support we get from them.

These are old pictures of my family members but I don't have a recent family photo with all of us together.

Sunday Reflection: Letting go of our E.G.O.'s

Okay, so I was reading Alex Boye's profile on Mormon.org.  He is a recording artist and also a member of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.  Anyway, he said  something that I want to share with you.   He said, "God can take ordinary people and put them in extraordinary situations, and can bless us all in ways we cannot comprehend. In order for that to happen, from my own experience I tell people that we need to let go of our E-G-Os ( Edge God Out.) That seems to be the reason for almost every problem we face in day-to day living..... We cannot survive in this world without Gods influence in our lives."

Satan tries to decieve us and get us to believe that there is no God.  He wants us to Edge God Out of the picture. He wants us to believe that we don't need Him to be happy.  We can survive this life on our own; rely on our own inner strength.  Anything we gain in this life is through our own efforts.  There is no God.

 To know God and to love Him means to live as He would have us live and keep His commandments. For some to recognize a God in their lives would mean change and that may be hard for them to accept. If they don't believe in God there is no lasting consequence to any choices that are made.  It's all about the here and now and no eternal consequences.  Do as you please here.  Tomorrow you will die.  No big deal. That's what Satan would have us believe.  He does not want us to return to our Father in Heaven.

I have such a testimony that we truly do have a Father in Heaven who loves us.  He knows us.  He stands ready to bless us beyond measure if we will learn of Him, keep His commandments, and trust in Him.  My life has been blessed tremendously because of my knowledge of my Father.  I know that I can go to Him in prayer and He hears me.  He answers my prayers.  He comforts me.  He strengthens me.  If I did not know God existed and did not know I could rely on Him through our trials I would have cracked a long time ago.  I would have given up on happiness in this life.  I would have given up on myself and my ability to handle certain responsibilities and pressures in my life.    I have just had so many witnesses that He IS!  Like Alex said, "God can bless us all in ways we cannot comprehend".    If we would just let Him in.

“All things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth... and its motion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator” (Book of Mormon, Alma 30:44).

I testify this is TRUE! 

Sunday Reflection: "Savior, Redeemer of My Soul"

Oh, a beautiful couple in our ward sang this song in Sacrament Meeting today and it just spoke peace to my soul.  It's such a beautiful song and beautiful words.  May this song touch your heart as it did mine.

1. Savior, Redeemer of my soul,
Whose mighty hand hath made me whole,
Whose wondrous pow’r hath raised me up
And filled with sweet my bitter cup!
What tongue my gratitude can tell,
O gracious God of Israel.

2. Never can I repay thee, Lord,
But I can love thee. Thy pure word,
Hath it not been my one delight,
My joy by day, my dream by night?
Then let my lips proclaim it still,
And all my life reflect thy will.

3. O’errule mine acts to serve thine ends.
Change frowning foes to smiling friends.
Chasten my soul till I shall be
In perfect harmony with thee.
Make me more worthy of thy love,
And fit me for the life above.

Text: Orson F. Whitney, 1855–1931
Music: Harry A. Dean, 1892–1987. © 1948 IRI
2 Nephi 1:15

Monday Reflection: House Upon a Rock

I don't know what is going on but it just seems like so many people I know or people I know who they know, etc....are having traumatic things occurr in their lives. Maybe it's because we had something traumatic happen to us and so we are more aware of things like this around us...I don't know, but it just seems like there are some heavy duty trials occurring for so many people.  I have met (through the internet) at least 3 people whose spouse has had a brain injury, a young girl of 16 who was in a serious accident who suffers from traumatic brain injury, a friend of mine whose nephew fell from a slide head first who has been in a coma and is in the hospital, a couple who just found out a couple of weeks ago that their 4 yr old son has a brain tumor and the very worst is expected for him, a guy from therapy who suffered spinal cord injury from a cough and was paralyzed from the neck down....  It's just all around.  I don't know if these things are occurring more or if it's just because I'm more aware of things like this because of what we have experienced.   

I know that this life is a test.  I know it's not supposed to be easy, but why does it have to be so hard sometimes?  Everyone will have to face challenges in this life.  All difficult.  No one will be spared heartache and pain and adversity.  I'm reminded of the scripture that talks about the wise man and the foolish man.  The wise man built his house upon the Rock.  The foolish man built his house upon the sand.   When the storms came the foolish man's house washed away and the wise man's house stood firm.  We all will face storms in our lives.  They will shake us to the core.  Our houses must be built on the Rock, our Savior, if we are to withstand these storms or trials.   We must gain a testimony of our Savior and His gospel now, because the trials will come and if we are not firm in our faith...we will fall. 

I think back to those first few days and weeks with Kary's stroke.  I was hit hard with this trial.  I was shaken to the core.   Every belief that I had in God and the gospel of Jesus Christ was questioned.  Was everything I believed really true?  Does God really exist?  Does he hear my prayers?  Will the priesthood blessings Kary recieved really come to pass?  The storm was rocking me.  Amidst the storm and all the questioning of my beliefs there was a calm and a peace that came to me and reminded me of all the witnesses I had been given in my life that God does exist, that He knows me, that He loves me, that He answers prayers, that the Priesthood works,   that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is real and true.  I knew it was going to be a long hard road, but the Holy Ghost was there to remind me that all those things I believed were indeed true and that I just needed to have faith, do my part, and that He would help us through.

The moments when we are struggling the most is also when Satan tries his hardest to get us to doubt our Father in Heaven and the love of our Savior which is why it's so important for us to have a foundation in Christ, our Rock.

Again, just grateful for my knowledge of my God and my Savior who help us every day to overcome our daily trials;  who give us the strength to carry on when the future is uncertain;  who give us hope and a promise of something better if we endure and stay true and faithful.

Sunday Reflection: HAPPINESS

Proverbs 16:20 "He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good: and whoso trusteth in the Lord, happy is he."   See also Proverbs 29:18; John 13:17; 1  Peter 3:14

I found this scripture in my daily scripture thought book.  I love it. 
The prophet Joseph Smith taught, " Happiness is the object and design of our existence and will be the end therof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God. (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. Joseph Fielding Smith [1976], 255-56.)

We all desire happiness.  Everything we do is probably motivated by the desire to be happy.  Right?  We all just want to be happy in this life.  What is required to obtain happiness?  A relationship with God and keeping His commandments.  I truly believe this.  People might think I'm whacked but I know it's true in my heart.  Nothing else will bring us true happiness.  Eternal happiness.  I will even venture to say peace.  We all seek peace as well.  Peace and Happiness.

No earthly possessions or status or whatever you seek to obtain in this life will bring you greater peace and happiness than knowing you are a child of God and trusting in Him and keeping His commandments. 

Satan does not want us to know this.  He will do everything in his power to have us believe that we don't need God to be happy.  He wants men to remain in a carnal state.

The Book of Mormon speaks of men that are in a “carnal state … and in the bonds of iniquity; they are without God in the world, and they have gone contrary to the nature of God; therefore, they are in a state contrary to the nature of happiness.” (Alma 41:11.) It also records Samuel the Lamanite’s warning to the Nephites: “Ye have sought all the days of your lives for that which ye could not obtain; and ye have sought for happiness in doing iniquity, which thing is contrary to the nature of that righteousness which is in our great and Eternal Head.” (Hel. 13:38.) Alma sums it up: “Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness.” (Alma 41:10)

 I almost think some people are out to prove that they can in fact find happiness without God in their lives and just as the Nephites in the Book of Mormon they seek for happiness in doing iniquity.  Unfortunately, they will never find it.  Oh sure, they can have happy moments but when it comes to true peace and happiness and contentment....it won't be there, not until they understand who they are as a child of God and gain a personal relationship with Him and with the Savior of us all will they ever be able to know true joy.   Don't you just wish you could knock people on the side of the head sometimes and wake them up and say, "C'mon!!"    It's just so frustrating that they will so easily listen to the world and are so stinking stubborn when it comes to God.  Why?  I just don't understand???  

Anyway, on another note....Trials are another necessary part of this life that can have an impact on our happiness.  We have the ability to choose happiness (God) or misery(Satan for he wants us all to be miserable like him)

Here is a story found in the Ensign that illustrates how we may choose our response to our trials and tribulations as told by  Elder Jack H. Goaslind of the Presidency of the First Quorum of the Seventy (May 1986), "Over one hundred years ago a Swedish family who had joined the Church faced a long ocean voyage to America, a train trip from New York to Omaha, and then a trek by wagon train to Salt Lake City. During their train trip they rode in stock cars used to haul hogs. The cars were filthy and filled with hog lice. On their wagon trip across the plains, a healthy baby was born, but their three-year-old contracted cholera. During the night, the father went to a neighboring wagon to borrow a candle, but was told they couldn’t spare one. This angered him, and he fumed as he sat in the dark with his son’s limp, feverish body in his arms. The boy died that night.

The next morning the wagon master said they would hold a short funeral and bury the boy in a shallow grave. They were in Indian country and didn’t have time to do more. The father insisted on staying behind and digging a grave deep enough so the animals would not disturb the body. They experienced other hardships before they reached Salt Lake City.

Now, both the mother and the father experienced the same trials, but the father became withdrawn, cantankerous, and bitter. He stopped going to church, found fault with Church leaders. He became caught up in his own miseries, and the light of Christ grew dimmer and dimmer in his life.

On the other hand, the mother’s faith increased. Each new problem seemed to make her stronger. She became an angel of mercy—filled with empathy, compassion, and charity. She was a light to those around her. Her family gravitated toward her and looked to her as their leader. She was happy; he was miserable. (See Ensign, Feb. 1981, pp. 54–55.)"

It is my testimony that we can find true peace and happiness in this life when we know God and keep His commandments.  If we trust in Him and rely on Him through our trials and adversity we will still be able to find joy and peace and happiness in our lives despite them.

Sunday Reflections: Our Hands-His Hands

I have so much in my heart that I don't know how to adequately express to those who have helped us in so many ways since Kary's stroke.  I found this video of a girl who has cerebral palsy and her experience.  The things she expresses are exactly my thoughts.  I could not express them better than she did.  It is a very humbling experience to constantly be on the receiving end of service.  We are ever grateful though because without all of you this earthly experience that we are having right now would be a lot harder.  We pray every day for strength to endure our trials.  God does strengthen us.  One way he does is by sending His earthly angels to minister unto us and help lighten our burdens.  Even if it's a visit from someone, a note, or a phone call or a meal....these little things mean so much to us and truly help lighten our load.  It is nice to know that there are so many people that we can rely on when we truly need it.  Your Hands are His Hands...and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. 

We have felt so blessed through our trials.  We truly hope that we also can be His hands in some small way.  The only way we can truly show our gratitude is by doing what we can to serve others as well.  This is one of my goals this year...to truly give where I can give...serve where I can serve....just do what I can to help others.  I know that when we are in the service of our fellowmen we are in the service of our God.  Thank you to so many people who have served as such examples to me.  I hope to be like you all someday.

Sunday Reflection: Death and Family Relationships

So, I have a dear friend whose mother passed on a couple of weeks ago.  I've been thinking about her alot as I know she and her mother were very close.  I think about my own mother and how I would feel and how hard it will be when she passes on to the next life. 

Death is a hard thing.  I have always had a hard time saying goodbye to people whom I love dearly.  When I was a missionary for our church there were times that I got transferred to different areas in the mission.  I sometimes would just leave without telling anyone because the thought of having to say goodbye to these people that I had grown to love so dearly was too hard on me.  I always hate saying goodbye to family when we have family gatherings or when they come to visit us.  There is always an aching and a void felt when we have to part ways. 

The one thing that brings me comfort of parting with family and death is knowing that if I live the commandments of our Father in Heaven that we will be together in the next life.  The Savior provided a way for families to be together forever.   HOW AWESOME!!!  This knowledge really does help me want to be a better person because I know that this blessing will only come if I am obedient to the commandments of our Father in Heaven.  I don't want to be alone in the next life.  How sad would that be? 

I'm grateful for our loving Father in Heaven who loves us and has a plan for family relationships  to continue hereafter.  Our Savior Jesus Christ provided a way for us to be resurrected and we may all be with Him and our families in the next life if we do what is right.